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Member 3 posts
Posted one year ago
I am finding that my daughter is actually eating ketchup jam and coffee granules. 3 bottles of ketchup in 3 weeks...a whole jar of coffee in less than a week. I have challenged this as clearly it is incredibly disordered. She is very unwell currently and I am DESPERATE not to make her feel more shame but unsure how to help really. It's awful to feel so unable to help your child when they are literally being tortured by this horrendous illness
Admin 179 posts
I am looking over the posts and I was wondering how you and your daughter are getting on?
Hi. Thanks for asking. She has just been discharged from a 3 week hospital admission. I think that the behaviours I described were an indication of how unwell and starved she actually was. Things are thankfully improving as she is currently positive about recovery and following the meal plan.....keeping EVERYTHING crossed!!!
That is such good news that your daughter is doing well, just brilliant. It is really only as they start to recover that we can have any objective view on what can easily be described as a strange and frightening. What amazed me was how I was prepared to accept anything as long as I kept her talking to me and let her know that she was not battling this on her own. I hope that she continues to recover, be easy and kind to yourself and if there are slips see them as that and keep your positive approach and your eyes on that prize. I will keep everything crossed for you as well
Yes communication is ultimately SO important. I have come to the conclusion that I spent too long "allowing" and not challenging what are essentially e.d behaviours as she had maintained her weight for several years prior to this frightening relapse. I think that tolerating increasingly "odd" / disordered habits allowed anorexia to take a tighter grasp and make my daughter become very ill again. I am now being much more observant and encouraging more normal habits. ....whilst hopefully not making her feel ashamed. It's a fine line I admit. But it's too hard for her to rationalise what is driving these behaviours xx
I have just asked my daughter who used to do this and she has given me some useful insights as she used to do this with cinnamon and vinegar(not at the same time). She said that primarily if you can make all the food taste the same then it is not so frightening and it all feels then like safe food, (that was a revelation to me), she also suggested that things like Ketchup are full of sugar = immediate energy so your daughter's starved body will be craving energy. Finally I think that the sense of taste becomes numbed and so therefore the individual can tolerate intense taste.
As what to do about, my advice is to let that go, it wont last for a long time and instead to concentrate on the positives, I know that this is not always easy and sometimes it feels as if there are no positives - but try to find them, try to calm her and show her a less fearful world. Is she under the care of an Eating Disorder team ?
Member 5 posts
I had not thought of excessive use of condiments as "ruining food". I genuinely cannot keep up the amount of salt, vinegar, mayonnaise and ketchup being used. It seems every time I put something in the bin there is another empty bottle in it.
Member 40 posts
Have they started on the cinnamon yet?
Member 11 posts
When my daughter was the eating unit they did not let them use condiments . I am not sure if this is something to address at home but she pours ketchup and vinegar all over the food . Should i be happy she is eating and save the battle or put a stop to the condiments ?
I am looking over the posts and I just wondered how you and your daughter are getting on ?
I think that this is a difficult one as my daughter did/ does that same and when she is struggling she uses more. In particular cinnamon and vinegar(not at the same time!). I have chosen to not challenge this as as you say this is a way that she finds helps her to eat. I wonder if the tastebuds become numb?
Thanks for the reply it's helpful to know other people are not challenging this . Yes we go through post of cinnammon too . I think the taste buds must dampen as a result of the restricted diet . I find that my daughter uses more ketchup , vinegar etc if the food was a favourite before the anorexia as a way of ensuring no pleasure can be got from the food ! Your reply helped me thank you